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- From a Fifteen Year Old Meth User
Letters from Crystal Meth Users
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Jan
11From a Fifteen Year Old Meth User
I'm 15 and I've been using meth for nine months. I'm addicted. I've been sober for about three weeks now, but not by choice. And it's been hell for me. I can't eat, sleep, think, or feel the right emotions at the right times. I didn't know what I was getting into and when I realized I was already too fucked up. If dope wasn't so much fun at first it would be a lot easier. The saddest part to me is that I can't remember the last nine months at all. I should have stopped when I realized that my thinking wasn't the same, but did I? No. Now I feel as though I can't have fun or be happy without dope. I love it when my pupils are huge and I'm all fucked up. I don't know maybe I'm just fucked up.
I just read a whole bunch of the letters and I can't tell you my story. I can't remember any of it. What made meth so appealing to me was that it made me not care about anything that was going on around me. I was quitting weed when I found speed that was a stupid substitution. The craziest part is that I was going out with this guy when I first tried it back in September. He broke up with me because he said I was a "tweeker." At that time it was a lie. I had only tried it with him a few times and he was a heavy user (I didn't know it at the time). Then we got back together in March and we were spun every moment we were together. I wish I could say that our relationship wasn't based on dope, but reality is it was. I'm hoping I can find the strength and get through this because it's killing me mentally. It's a war I wish I would have never started, a road that does not need to be traveled anymore. I've found out that drugs are stronger to love to some people, to others love is drugs. Thanks for listening. Ashley.
Ashley
