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Teen Stories of Meth Abuse and Struggles
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Mar
20My Special Eating Disorder
I've been using crystal, glass, and shit, whatever you want to call it for about 6 months on and off. I used to go a month or 2 without using. Now, just in the past 3 weeks I've been using just about every day. It's weird because my friend (who I started with) and I think we're so smart, we researched all the effects so we knew what we were getting into. I see the pictures on this site and on others and I think to myself "That will never be me. I'm not like those people. But in a way I am. I mean I'm from a good family, I do well in school, I'm not an outcast, and I'm even really involved in my church. Besides a few friends no one knows my secret. I remember always saying I'd never do meth. That it was dirty and gross and here I am doing it. I feel like I lead a completely double life sometimes. The saddest part is that I see what it's doing to the boy I'm in love with. He was one of the first people I told I had tried meth and he sat me down and we had a long talk. I remember the things he said so clearly, all the bad effects and how he didn't want that for me.
Well, turns out three months later he started doing it too. I just saw him recently and he has lost so much weight. He's not the same person I first fell for. I miss that guy, not the ghost of him that's here. Worst of all after having my heart ripped out by seeing him, and just feeling down, I resorted to doing it again. I know I'll quit. I have to. I'm just scared of how hard it'll be for me. I guess the weight loss really has me hooked on it. It's like a weight loss aid. A friend of mine thinks it's my special type of eating disorder, but I don't know and I don't understand why I still continue to use considering all I've experienced and gone through. I guess it's blinded me. Don't start. Don't be me.
Christina, Santa Fe Springs, California, USA
